Woo Hoo

I got a "Woo Hoo" yesterday...'bout blew me away!! I haven't had one since I can't remember when...I think there was even a whistle in there..or maybe it was just some young testosterone squeal. Hard to say. I was helping the little Bohemian move her things into to the new place and something fell out of one of the many clothes baskets of CLOTHES that child has and I set the basket down and bent over to retrieve it....putting the old ass up high in the air...and just about that time a car of guys must have driven by. I'm straining my back mind you, as I bend over to grab some item or other...maybe it was a thong and that's what they were holloring about. But never you mind...my ass was in the air and I HEARD IT....A WOO HOO. I wanted sooo bad to pop up and turn to see who was verbally appreciating the old flabby ass stuck all up in the air as it was...but I was afraid...I didn't want to scar these poor kids for life...they were probably hung over from the night before....and I'm sure their eyes were blood shot and they had lost their glasses...so the old flab must have looked firm to their party-tired eyes...and I really didn't want to freak them out by turning around and having them look into the face of Phyillis Diller....ya know how that is...whistle at a cute backside and she turns around and it's your grandmother!!!! So.....I just smiled and threw the clothes back on top of the basket and picked it up and headed to the duplex door....Oh yeah baby....I'm STILL all that and a dill pickle on the side!!! LMAO!!!!!

So yeah, the girls are all moved in now. It's a much nicer place than where we moved them out of for sure!! Clean carpet and freshly painted walls...three full bathrooms and a fenced in backyard for the granddog. They even have an iron patio set...SHIT their place is nicer than mine for the love of GOD!!! What the hell is wrong with this picture!!! We pull up loaded for bear with a truck and car trailer cram packed and a mini van busting at the seams...and that's really just two girls worth, mind you...and all I could say was DAMN!!!! This place is NICE!!!!! Even the Water Boy and his buddy, one of my kidz, the HomeComing King who followed behind us to help...(Thank God for young handsome men's muscles) had some nice things to say...until we went inside...and their they were...those fucking stairs....The first thing out of Water Boy's mouth was "Oh FUCK!! STAIRS!!!...How many bedrooms do we have to carry shit upstairs for???!!!!" Uhhhmmmmmm, well Precious...all of them!! LUFF YOU!!!!! Yeah, I'm sure the Gypsy had to spring for a lot of beer for all that sweat...but I'm the Momma...and I'm not to know of such things...so I will pretend that I don't know about that....:P

So yeah...we start in around 10:00 AM...I'm just rearing to go for the first five or six loads up them damn steps and then ....Holy Fuck....how much shit do we still have left???!!!!! Yeah, I'm old and the stairs had me huffin' and puffin' and cussing and finding any excuse I could not to have to go up them anymore. Son of a MUTHER!!! Why can't you guys rent a ranch style house??!!!! Mattresses and box springs and bed frames and dressers and laundry baskets of clothes times 200 and boxes of bullshit and OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST SET THE REST OF THIS SHIT AT THE CURB!!!!! But finally everything was empty and we just plopped down in the A/C on the freshly washed carpet and moaned and groaned and breathed....and once the sweat dried off our bodies...movement began...first it was Mr. Fixit....who was smart enough to make a bee-line for the door and his truck with attached empty car trailer before any of the room mates showed up to beg his help. Little Brother...my beloved Water boy...and his buddy the HomeComing King were not so lucky...Long called...yeah, that's his name, get over it!! The only male brave enough to move in with this house of hormonal winds....he's from Taiwan...and he's very proud of his country...but whenever he brings it up I have to bite my lip to keep from busting out laughing...cause all I can think about is that line from the Armageddon movie where the Russian astronaut is banging on the space ship with a big ass wrench screaming...Russian components...American components...ALL MADE IN TAIVAN!!!! LMAO Okay, so anyways...Long calls...and needs a little help...so the Gypsy does what she does best...charms her little brother and his friend into making a trip over there with her to help load a bed and huge ass TV. I think there was some mention of 'herb' in the bribe and charm...but I'm the momma...so I didn't hear ANYTHING!!!

And me???? Well the whole damn house clears out and I turn into my mother and start to set things right. I have moved several times in that last 40 some odd never you mind how many years, and every time I do, my mom is there. I don't ask her to help...she just knows I'm moving and she shows up. She has this thing about putting the kitchen and bathroom together as well as making sure all the beds are set up and made up for the coming night before she will leave. It's her thing....I don't ask her to do it...I think she does it cause she wants to make sure it's done. Every surface in the entire kitchen is wiped down with pine sol water so SHE KNOWS it's clean. and the same goes for the bathrooms....and she can't leave without making sure her daughter and her grandbabies have a bed made up to sleep in that night. Fuck the pictures and the throw rugs and all the other boxes of shit...makes no never mind to her...but by God that woman is gonna make sure you can eat, shit, shower and crash in your own bed at the end of the day. I bought the house I have now 10 years ago, and my mother...at the age of 73, was up on a step stool wiping the top kitchen cabniet shelves out...I shit you not...with me telling her to get the hell down and let me do it and still...she stood her ground and made sure she got the job done RIGHT. Gotta Love that woman!!!! And I...being older...and at peace with the fact I have turned into my mother...set out to do the same yesterday in my girls' new place. Call me stupid, call me crazy, call me insane...I'll agree with it all...but by God if my mother, at the age of 73 could do it 10 years ago, I can do it now!!! And I did.

Then I had to drive all the way home to get the grandpets...cause I didn't want to take them the first trip and have them under foot while we were going in and out...and I couldn't fit all the shit I washed and folded back into the same van I took it out of..so fuck it...I waited and took it on the second load...and I am whipping in and out of all the other trucks/trailers/cars/vans loaded down with shit to the breaking point, cause all of this college town was moving from one place to another yesterday...and my van pretty much empty now...I'm smiling and waving at all those poor suckers who still have to unload all their SHIT...and then I pull up to the new place...and their is the Bohemian's car....she just got off work...and she's there to unload...and HOLY SHIT, you can't see out of her back window...and the trunk is cram packed full...and hell here we go again with those fucking stairs!!!!! And once again I'm huffing and puffing and cussing and ready to hurt somebody...and it's the next to the last laundry basket of yet another load of clothes...I swear to GOD these girls could dress all of Kansas out of their damn closets.. and SHIT something falls off the top of this overflowing clothes basket and I have to bend down to pick it up and the back is screaming and the legs are howling and then I heard it...."WOOOO HOOOO!!" and maybe a whistle...the blood was rushing to my head in such a roar I can't be certain...might have been a higher pitched yell...but yeah...there it was....some car load of hung over guys wooo hoooing at my tire ole aching ass all stuck up in the air as it was. Yeah...I don't give a shit if they were hung over and their blood shot eyes could not make out the veins running up my legs or the fact the gray hairs were all tucked up in a bun on the back of my head. It was a woooo hooooo and it was MINE!!!!!

Yeah baby...mine all mine...a Wooo Hooo from a car load of guys in a college town. Go ahead, be jealous!!! I'd do my little HA HA HA dance, but my legs are still aching to bad to get off this computer chair....and that...my poor bitches who didn't get a wooo hooo yesterday...is the dill pickle 'bout THAT!!!! LMAO....now...who the hell wants to get over here and give me a back rub??!!!